Monday, October 10, 2011

Our Teachers Are All Around Us

This past weekend I was wiped out, primarily because of my lunar cycle starting and just feeling down right exhausted from it.  I felt heavy, tired, inexplicably sad, scattered and unmotivated to do much of anything.  On Saturday, I napped when Anjali did and woke up feeling a little better but not completely.  Rishi unexpectedly had to meet someone to show his mom's car that they're trying to sell, which meant a heavy, tired, inexplicably sad, scattered, unmotivated me alone with a well rested Anjali.  Not that I don't do that every single day of the week, I just usually feel a bit stronger and I expect to have Rishi there to buffer on the weekends.  So, needless to say, I felt the brooding Jyoti coming on.  Laid it on thick with Rishi when he was leaving and then tried to get Anjali distracted with something so I could continue to zone out.  But I remembered I hadn't watered the garden yet.

So, I told Anjali that we were going to water the garden but that we couldn't get too wet, we just had to get the water in the garden and that was it.  Yeah, right! She loves water and loves watering herself as well as the garden.  But I was irritated, didn't want to have to take her clothes off, dry her off and get her dressed in dry clothes, upstairs!  I just wanted her to stop playing in the water.  Stop being a kid. A kid in love with water.  I snapped at her.  Threatened to turn the water off.  Moved it away from her every time she got near.  Finally, still brooding, I gave up fighting her and just got lost in my own thoughts as she literally soaked herself from head to toe.

As I was lost in thought, I started to fear that my negative energy was going to go into the seeds, never mind the kid, and they wouldn't start to sprout.  Then, I pulled focus with my eyes from the water and saw Anjali in a state of complete bliss, dripping from every place possible, laughing and just wholeheartedly loving the moment.  I started to break from my brood of a moment.  I felt myself lighten up, loosen up and relax.  I smiled, even though I had to fight myself to let myself smile.  I giggled at this wild child who felt so satisfied with herself and the moment despite the crisp temperature and her drenched state.  She started to laugh and then I started to laugh and then I let go completely and allowed myself to play with her with the water, splashing her, moving it and then getting her again.  All the while intensifying the bliss of the moment for both of us.  Our eyes caught one another and we just cackled away.

Then I pulled focus again, back to the garden that I was supposed to be watering and saw a speck of green.  I thought it was a leaf that had fallen but then I stood up and walked closer and looked again... it was a sprout, a collard green sprouted!  And there were several of them.  And some kale sprouts too!   My heart just melted!  My Anjali sprout and my collard sprout both having a joyous afternoon in the water and love.  She was so excited too, once I got her to see the tiny plant!  Ahhhh, what a beautiful moment.  And what amazing teachers, my two little sprouts, to help remind me of what is truly important!  Don't forget, we are NOT perfect, just seeking those perfect moments that constantly surround us!

Brood just for a moment, it's ok.  But then pull your focus and try to see what perfection surrounds you!

Love. Smile. Water. Drench. Sprout. Breathe.

The photo for this post is from Danilo Rizzuti's profile on Free Digital Photos.

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